2004 - 2009
Standing In The Way Of Control on 2008-09-17
I'm starting to buckle under this pressure, but I think I'm coping. I just hope it doesn't result in some huge, psycho explosion.
I've got too much going on at home, too much going on at college, too much going on with my friends and I don't like being relied on so much. And I can't say how I'm feeling to anyone because I don't want to be a burden.
I keep on remembering things that I have to do and then remembering several more things at the same time- to just forget them several minutes later.
And I won't have another break until at least the weekend after next.
I know I'm obsessing over nothing. It's just like I want to shake myself and scream "man up" or "just deal with it", because that's how much patience have at the moment.
I was looking at my further English theory book that I have to read tomorrow and I don't understand any of it. I can't read it because it's so difficult and there's no one to help me with it.
What's worse is that I feel like I'm slipping back into how I used to feel. All I want to do at the moment is read The Catcher in the Rye and I don't think that's a good sign.